the things I hold in high esteem about my father
is the fact that I never saw him reject my mother's
food even when they had serious misunderstanding. In fact, its a
big "sin" for his
food to be unprepared when he is ready. Oga
husband, you gave your wife money for food and
after it was prepared you refuse to eat because
you dey vex. Its one of the greatest signs of
immaturity, its time to grow up! You should not even abandon
your home for any reason, you
could go somewhere when angry but ensure that
you don't allow it to linger unnecessarily because
that is enough for the devil to build on.
2) Telling your wife
severally that you are the
head: may I let you know that even when your
wife disobeys/disrespect you she still knows that
you are the head. You need not shout or scream it
daily. Its important for you to know when and
how to be firm and put your feet down over issues, however don't
become a nagging
husband just to prove that you are the head.
3) Issuing threats:
beating, verbally abusing your
wife, issuing threats of divorce or bragging about
marrying another wife does not make you a man.
Your strength is in your ability to tame your
tongue and control your fist. When she is acting
her "childish woman" part, play the "matured man."
4) Reporting
your wife to friends and family:
When your wife offends, correct and talk things
through. You don't have to tell everyone about
her mistakes, that will paint her black and sell her
cheap such that you will not be able to redeem
her back. It is also out of place for any man to love his mother
more than his wife and kids,
doing this only sets up your home for crisis.
5) Competition: have
you seen couples who
compete with each other over material
acquisitions? Their properties and investments
are always in separate names. As the wife
borrows to buy a Ferrari, the husband is running
after a bugatti. How childish can we be? This also leads to
insecurity, jealousy and inferiority/
superiority complex. Please let's check ourselves
and work as a team because its one of the ways
to succeed as a couple.
6) Keeping malice: is it not funny to know
that
some men keep malice? Some of them even nag,
criticise, abuse and call their wives names in
public. It may make you look like a "big boy"
who's in control but you are not going to gain
anything good from it, your home will only be a den of insults and
confrontations.
7) Not helping with house chores: I must say here
that it is the sole responsibility of a woman to
tend and manage a home. However, its not a bad
thing if a man lends a helping hand when
necessary. Watching football with newspaper in
your hand every evening not caring how stressful the house
chores are will only increase the
pressure on your wife and if you truly care you'll
help, just checking on her while busy could
encourage and sooth her, this also makes you a
good example to the kids especially the boys.
Some men don't even say "thank You" to their wives after eating,
all they do is compare her with
other women. Its also childish to say you do not
care about how the kids are raised. Its a shame
that after having 3-4kids some men cannot
change a simple diaper or prepare cereal. Lastly, everyman should
have a church
where his family is watered and raised spiritually.
This makes you accountable, it's immaturity and
dangerous to be a sheep without a shepherd. As
you learn and grow in the right fold, you'll be
able to take the lead as the head of the home.
(Women's own coming soon)
