READ THE TYPES OF STUDENTS YOU'LL FIND IN A TYPICAL NIGERIAN UNIVERSITY CLASSROOM.

1. THE GOOD LISTENERS: These ones dey listen an jot down notes wella. They are always found in the front. Most of them are direct entry and they sabi ITK die.
2. THE ON-LOOKERS: These ones cannot really be classified as good-listeners because they just
come to class look at the lecturer, so confused. Whether the lecturer dey yarn german or speaking gibberish or mumbo jumbo, na to dey look be their own. Why he ask do you understand? Na them dey shout "yeeeeees" Na so them go dey look till exam finish.
3. THE PHOTOCOPYING BROTHERHOOD: Oh my! These people know themselves. They are always found saying "abeg I no get strength to write note, do sharp make I photocopy". This set of people can photocopy anything on paper. Na because of them handout no dey sell. If you no hold yourself well, dem go photocopy you join.
4. "THE THIS MAN TOO FAST" TEAM: These students are damn slowww, slower than Mikel Obi. If the lecturer tries to fasten up his dictation, they just hands down and join the onlookers.

5. THE LATECOMERS GANG: These are the people who enjoy and derive pleasure from coming to class after lecture has started. They just like sneaking in. I begin to wonder why they sneak in, you no pay skul fees? Abi no be
You get the admission neh?.
6. THE SLEEPERS CONGLOMERATE: This group can sleep on behalf of the atlantic Ocean, they sleep without fear or favour, they just find any spot with or without breeze and 10mins into the lecture, they are off.
7. THE BORROWERS LEAGUE: Whether them be students abi them be non-learning students, I don't just understand. These people can never have biro or calculator even inside exam hall, they keep borrowing till their bag is full of everything.
8. THE ARGUEMENT LORDS: These group of people are just looking for how to start a new controversy. They just love to argue, funny thing is that they might not be intelligent in class ooo. But when it
comes to arguments you can never win them. see talent.
9. THE QUESTIONNAIRES CLUB: Chei these people can ask useless questions for the sake of Namibia. Sometimes the lecturers go just vex out of frustration and feel like punching the student. You can imagine somebody asking "sir, should I write my name on my answer booklet before submitting?"
10. THE INVINCIBLE/GHOST STUDENT: What can I say? these people never attend class but their names are always in the attendance sheet and they always write test and never have carry over. ghost students. They are also reading this right now.
11. THE NOISEMAKERS EMPIRE: These ones are different from the "argumentists" in the sense that the arguers have points but these ones just make noise randomly and keep disturbing d class.
12. THE FASHIONISTA CLIQUE: All they pray for is people to look at them and WOW. They have the latest dress in Vogue. They wear different clothes everyday and we wey dey repeat cloth go just Kack one side dey pray make dey fall inside poto-poto make we laugh. Badbelle.
13. THE NAIRABET UNITED: Anyway all na work of the devil. Na so Chelsea, ManU, Arsenal, Madrid, Barca, Keshi even Enyimba dey cause wahala.
14. THE NON ACADEMIC STUDENTS: These ones always have something to do somewhere. They just want the lecture to end so that they can go sharp sharp.
15. THE GBAGAUN DETECTORS: They may not be listening ooo. But when the lecturer makes one single English error. Gbam! Work don start be dat. They go analyse am pass Microbiology laboratory result.
16. THE AMEBO OFFICERS: their own na to observe anything wey dey happen and them no dey keep their mouth shut. Amebo go kill them, you no need tell me, na there Campus Gist belong.
No lie, Which group do you belong to?

Comments On The Disqus Comments Below