I woke up the following morning on the
bed unclad with Iyoaye beside me. I felt
a throb of pain at my head and I
struggled to get up. When I stood up,
Iyoaye woke up
Sis Iyoaye: Collins good morning.
Me: (respect no dey again) good morning
Iyoaye. How was your night? And how
did I get to the bed?
Iyoaye: I dragged you to the matrass so
that you could be able to sleep. But, the
way you crashed, it’s like as if you have
gone on a sex spree yesterday afternoon
with Dcns Emeka
Me: are you for real?
Iyoaye: Don’t you think I always see her
when she looks at you seductively in the
church? Even yesterday when she was
looking at you she was stylishly rubbing
her chest
Me: Hian! Iyo of gbogbo Aye! How do
you think it will be possible for me to be
fcuking a married woman? Even in the
church? I am disappointed in you.
Even…..
Iyoaye: (cuts in) Noooo. Don’t get me
wrong o. I am not saying that you
shouldn’t relate with her but I’m a
jealous woman who doesn’t like to her
man with any woman.
Me: like Bro. Tunji?
Iyoaye: No. you suppose to have said Bro
Mattkelly (hisses)
We were eating breakfast when the Head
Pastor called me. He said that he
declares Monday as work free day for us.
But I should ensure that my phone is ON.
After the call, I held Iyoaye waist and
looking at her, I saw the passion burning
like a fire in her eyes. As I was about
kissing her she said:
Iyoaye: Collins, will you promise me
something?
Me: if it is what I can do, I will if
not………..but I will try
Iyoaye: Promise me that you wont betray
me?
Me: Iyoaye, I am a complicated person. I
wont promise you yes but I will try.
Iyoaye: so do you just want to use me
and dump me?
Me: No Iyoaye. Ti mba so wipe
adegunleni, ti mo si so wipe adeogunlola
nko, ki lo nfeki n se? (If I say yes today
and I later reverted tomorrow to say no,
what will you do?) it is better let us be
fcukmates or FWB
Iyoaye: what is the meaning of FWB?
Me: Friends with bnefits.
After a while she said
Iyoaye: ok I have heard you.
We started kissing and I used one of my
hands to rub her Weapon of Mass
Defence while the other hand was
squeezing her Weapon of Mass
Destruction. She was using one of her
hands to hold and squeeze my OPA –
MOSE while she was using the other
hand to rub my head. She went straight
down to my OPA – MOSE and began to
suck it. It was as if I used morphine to
deaden the pain in my head. We fcuked
twice before she left for her house. As
soon as she left, I dialed Dcns Emeka’s
number
Dcns Emeka: Accountant, na wa for you.
You forgot me since….
Me: (Kisses her on the phone) sorry dear,
I almost forgot to call you.
Dcns Emeka: o ti de level yen abi? Mo to
bi e lomo Accountant (has it gotten to
that level? I am old enough to be your
mum, Accountant)
Me: (laughed) yes you are old enough to
be my mum and young enough to suck
my OPA – MOSE
Dcns Emeka: (purred) yessss.
Accountant, I missed “SHORT MAN
DEVIL”
Me: (stroking my OPA – MOSE) yes it is
missing you.
Dcns Emeka: will you be chanced today?
Me: Nooo. I am dead tired.
Dcns Emeka: why wont you be tired?
Anyway how about your sister?
Me: oh! She had left this morning. Dcns,
can we talk later.
Dcns Emeka: ok love.
Me: ok ma. Talk to you later.
After she ended the call I was pondering;
Why did Iyoaye talked about Dcns Emeka
like that?
Why is Iyoaye desperate in hooking me?
Why? Why? Why?
*************************************************
(After few months)
The project has commenced and Dcns
Emeka and I did not have the
opportunity to see frequently. But
anytime she comes to my office, she
doesn’t leave without us kissing each
other. With Iyoaye, I decided to give her
some space so that the feelings she has
for me will die down. Then on one fateful
day the Head Pastor summoned me to
his office and after I sat down,
Head Pastor: Accountant, I have
observed that you have not introduced
any lady to us that you want to marry.
Are you GAY or are you castrated?
Me: no sir. It is just that. Gbogboawon
sister ninu church wa yii n’onsako (every
sister in this church are forming big
girls)
Head Pastor: what about Sis. Iyoaye?
Me: (lol) no……
Head Pastor: That’s by the way. We are
having a new Associate Pastor. His
name is Pastor Onihaxy and he is
resuming tomorrow. He will be using the
office beside the bookshop.
Me: it is okay sir.
Head Pastor: have you prepared the
documentation for the release of the
second stage of payment for Dcns Emeka
Me: yes sir. I will bring it to your office
asap.
The following day came and as I came to
the office, I saw pastor Onihaxy and Sis
Iyoaye talking with each other and Sis
Iyoaye was laughing. After the devotion,
the Head Pastor introduced him to us
and we in turns introduced each other.
I observed when Pst. Onihaxy resumed
that he will spend time with Iyoaye in the
bookshop and sometimes they leave the
office together. Then one day I called
Iyoaye over the intercom
Me: Hello. Please see me in my office
Sis. Iyoaye: why do you want to see me
Mr.?
As I was trying to explain the reasons
why she should come, she ended the call.
Two hours later she came and stood by
the door:
Sis. Iyoaye: Mr. Accountant, why do you
want to see me?
Me: Come in and sit down pleaseeee (I
winked at her)
Sis. Iyoaye: Mr. I don’t have time to
waste. Say whatever you want to say.
I was angry but kept my cool
Me: well get ready for Stock Audit
tomorrow.
She left angrily from my office
The following day, I resumed early in the
bookshop. When I was there, I also
observed that Pst. Onihaxy too was with
us. Though, it was he and Sis. Iyoaye
were together. When we got to the
foreign books section, I observed that
Pst. Onihaxy was stylishly smooching
her Weapon of Mass Destruction. I called
her for some observation
Me: Sis. Iyoaye, in your records you
registered 20 books but physically it is
34 books. Can you explain please?
Sis. Iyoaye: (started fidgeting) erm……
Accountant I can explain…..erm…..erm….
I kept quiet and noted it in my draft
report. After the stock taking, I left for
my office. I worked all through the day.
But around 7pm that night – in the
office……
To Be Continued
