after it till it parked infront of segun’s
compound. The guy at the back seat
alighted from the bike and he was
looking so lean and unkept, he turned
sideways and his appearance matched
that of segun.
“Sege!, sege!!, sege!!!” I screamed from
afar and he turned around, saw me and
screamed “onihaxy!!!!!!!!”.
I was so happy and joyous as I ran
closer to him with tears soaked in my
eyes as he drew closer to me. We hugged
and exchanged pleasantries.
ME: sege!!!!!!!!!, what happened now?,
where have you been?, why are you so
rough like this?,
SEGE: my brother, its a long story jawe.
ME: really?, what happened?
SEGE: let’s go inside first.
Segun and I entered the compound as we
went to his room, his neighbours were
coming out one after the other and they
began to ask him several questions,
“uncle segun, where have you been?”
“Uncle segun, did you travel?”
“Segun, you just left without telling
anybody”
“Segun, what happened to your phone?”
They continued to ask him series of
questions which he answered some and
ignored some. We eventually got to his
room, he opened the door and we
entered. His room was a small single
room self-contain with an inbuilt toilet,
kitchen and bathroom. I sat down on his
bed and he sat beside me. We hugged
each other again.
SEGE: onihaxy baba!!!!, how things na?
Na your face be this?
ME: na me ooooo. I’m so happy I set my
eyes on you again
SEGE: how did you know this place?
ME: when I arrived akure, I went to your
former house, I met “mama sofia” and
she directed me to meet the barber
infront of the house for your new
address.
SEGE: oh, ibrahim, that’s true, I know
him.
ME: so how far with the police case?,
have you been released?
SEGE: **** suprised*** police case?,
which police case is that?.
ME: I was told you were arrested for
buying a stolen iphone and would be
charged to court next week.
SEGE: me?, stolen phone?, nothing of
such happened to me.
ME: ** confused**** are you serious?
SEGE: yes, I’m serious, where did you get
this information from?
ME: wait, where have you been for the
past one week?
SEGE: na so we see am oooooo, na pussy
hunting pushed me to camp ooo.
ME: I don’t understand.
SEGE: I meet a very fine and clean girl
about 8 weeks back, this girl too clean
and fine ehn, she get front, get back and
owns a nice deadly curve.
ME: wetin come happen?
SEGE: ok, I approached her and wanted
to sign autograph on her pussssy, and
she said I have to be coming to her
church before she could date me.
ME: hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
SEGE: she dey attend a white garment
church. Since I was so determined to drill
her borehole, I had no choice than to join
the church to achieve my aim.
ME: so what happened next?,
SEGE: in the process of attending the
church. She took me to her pastor
2weeks back and the pastor had some
visions towards me.
ME: hmmmm. What was the vision?
SEGE: he said death was closer to me
and some enemies were trying to kill me.
He said I should camp myself in church
for 7days without talking to any one on
phone, and no one must be aware that
I’m going to church. That was how I left
home 8days ago.
ME: eeeeyah.
SEGE: so where did you get this
information from that I was arrested?
ME: sebi I was at home last week friday, I
dialled you line and it wasn’t going
through. I continued till wednesday or
thereabout and it was still unreachable.
SEGE: ehn ehn.
ME: so yesterday, a guy called me
claiming to be your lawyer. He said you
were arrested for buying a stolen iphone,
and that the phone was stolen with a
jeep, and that you will be charged to
court on monday
***phone ringing*******. Excuse me
segun!!
SEGE: is that the lawyer calling?
ME: no, its adebimpe.
SEGE: ***clears throat*** you and this
your bimpe sha. Una still dey run things
abi?
ME: I dey come abeg **picked the call
and placed it on my ear** hello bimpe
BIMPE: onihaxy, what happened to you
line since morning?, have you seen the
money?
ME: I’m sorry, my battery was down, I
received the alert. Thanks so much dear
BIMPE: you are welcome babyboy. I’m
through with that report also. I will send
it to your mail later in the day
ME: thanks so much. I so much
appreciate.
BIMPE: don’t mention jaree, when will
you be coming back?
ME: on sunday
BIMPE: no problem. Bring something for
me oooo.
ME: trust me, I will
BIMPE: that’s my baby. Talk to you later
dear
ME: alright, bye ***hanged up***
SEGUN: onihaxy!!!!!!, so you mean you
still hangout with this evil woman?
ME: no segun. I didn’t talk to her since
the day she told me about betty of which
you are aware of, but I was forced to call
her yesterday to borrow me 50k to pay
your lawyer. That was how we got talking
again.
SEGUN: 50k? My lawyer?, is it up to that
level?
ME: no be small thing ooo
SEGE: and bimpe was aware that the
money was meant for me abi?
ME: not at all.
SEGE: sha be careful, that all I will say,
so go on.
ME: alright. The lawyer said you are in
police custody and that you had been
badly beaten and that the police needed
100k to settle it out of court. I told him I
don’t have much, he then told me to get
50k and he would get the rest.
SEGE: omo see scam ooo. And why didn’t
you inform my family members you have
their contacts to confirm from them?
ME: he said I shouldn’t inform any of
your family and that you said you don’t
want people to be aware.
SEGE: see me see wahala ooo. How could
I be arrested and people will not be
aware of it?
ME: but what baffled me was that he
knew I was in lagos and even told me I
work in a bank, just surprised how he got
my information,
SEGE: he knew your location and
occupation? Then he must have went
through my phone to even know your
number. So you came all the way from
lagos because of me?
ME: yes bro, I didn’t go to work today sef
just becos of you.
SEGE: thanks so much bro.
ME: don’t mention jaree. I know you will
do more than that for me if I was the
one arrested.
SEGE: I’m still surprised sha. Did you
record your conversations?
ME: huuuuuh, no I didn’t.
SEGE: chai onihaxy!!!!!!, you fucked up
sha.
ME: no mind me, my mind no dey there.
SEGE: I’m coming, let me bring my
phone.
ME: ok.
SEGE: ****stood up, went away and
returned**** onihaxy, you won’t believe I
met my phone on another spot different
from where I dropped it before leaving
for church and the funniest thing is that
my phone was fully charged before I left,
now the battery level is 31%. And my
phone wasn’t on security lock.
ME: ***mouth opened wide**** iro ni
oooo, how come?
SEGE: onihaxy, its official, someone
entered my room and accessed my
phone.
ME: so who could that be?
SEGE: I don’t even know. But the only
person that has access to my room is
tunde, my landlord’s son. He knew where
I used to drop my key.
ME: is it only him.
SEGE: yeah. Onihaxy!!, you know what?
ME: what?
SEGE: let me see the number
ME: ******showed him the number***
SEGE: onihaxy, this number doesn’t look
familiar to me. Ok, dial the number and
placed it on loudspeaker and also use
voice recorder.
ME: ok ****dial the number and it was
switched off****
SEGE: hmmmmm, I guess the person
knows I’m around. But don’t worry, let me
save the number, I will get to the root of
the matter and get the person.
ME: ok bro. That good.
Segun and I continued to gist about so
many things. And before 8pm in the
night. Like 2 of his other friends outside
ondo state called him to ask about the
same police case and they said they paid
30k and 50k respectively to this same
lawyer.
To be continued
